Tuesday, August 22, 2006

An Immodest Proposal

My poor mailman. Every day he brings more pounds of mail from Howard Dean, Hillary Clinton, Al Gore, James Carville, Charles Schumer, the DNC, the DFA and it never ends. All are asking, begging, shaming, cajoling, entreating me for money, and it's money that I'm happy to give. However, I also think back to 2004, 2002, 2000 and remember receiving the same appeals. I often responded to those pleas by writing out checks and in 2004 when the full ugly stink of the Bush presidency was apparent, I dipped into my meager pocketbook to the tune of a couple grand.


However, I also remember the anger and frustration at seeing my candidates ducking bullets instead of returning fire, of meeting slime boat attacks with a curious silence and the surprising and still puzzling news that the end of the 2004 campaign saw the loser with 15-20 million still in the bank.


So this year, I'm drawing the line.


Attention: Dr. Howard Dean, Hon. Rahm Emanuel, Sen. Charles Schumer, et al. If I'm going to continue to share my paltry means with the Democratic Party, I expect you to do a few things that I would be embarrassed to know that you haven't done yet.


1. Rent a nice economical but secure room somewhere and gather together a group of politically knowledgeable, dependably partisan and aggressively persuasive people with a fax machine and the fax numbers of all significant newsrooms across these 50 States. Tell this group that their job is to monitor all trash, sewage and other effluent spilling forth from the Republican noise machine and immediately formulate an effective response for each and every piece of poison and toxic waste that floats into the political discourse. Then fax it out to the media universe to counter lies, to set the record straight but most of all, to seize the initiative and not let Karl Rove once again control the conversation.


2. On the other side of the room, gather together a similar but more devious group with their own matching fax machine. Tell these people to dig up dirt about any Republican that is in a close race with a Democrat. And let me define dirt: Anything that exposes the Republican as being an enthusiastic corporate shill (to the detriment of their constituents), or a stealth religious fanatic or simply any kind of a hypocrite (which covers most of the current Grand Old Party).


3. On the 12th anniversary of the "Contract with America," I implore Minority Leader Reid and Minority Leader Pelosi to devise a catalogue of liberal ideals.


My immodest proposal is


We hold these truths to be self-evident:


  a. That no one is above the law no matter what position they hold in the government and each of the three branches of government is in all circumstances fully accountable to either and both of the other two.


  b. That all Americans are born equal as human beings and are entitled to maintain their self-respect and their freedom from catastrophic circumstances and should thus be provided at least minimal access to food, shelter and medical care.


  c. That while all citizens have a serious responsibility to their nation, their government should at all times respect their privacy, show them due respect and refrain from interfering in their affairs.


  d. That taxes are a burden to be shared by all and those who have reaped the greatest rewards from our free and prosperous society should return a greater share than those who have not.


  e. That families are the cornerstone of our nation and that families, in whatever form they exist, are to be supported so that they both provide a healthy nurturing environment for children to grow and develop as well as provide a medium for human affection, devotion and love to thrive and prosper.


  f. That social security and Medicare reflect our nation's unswerving commitment to fully guarantee a comfortable, safe and secure life for each and every citizen as they age.


  g. That while our nation's giant corporations provide essential products and services that generate much of our wealth, their interests must be balanced with the interests of its workers, our small businesses and the global environment.


  h. That consumers have a right to safe, usable and honest products and services and that the penalties for failing to deliver those should be grievous, since a breech of contract between supplier and consumer strikes at the very heart of the American business enterprise.


  i. That those whose labor drives our economy have full and unencumbered recourse to air grievances, block unfair and unsafe workplace practices, negotiate fair compensation and have the freedom to organize without hindrance.


  j. That this nation's history eloquently speaks to the necessity of having a viable two-party system and that the genius of our Constitution lies largely in its intricate and essential checks and balances which must never be subverted or undermined.


4. Finally, I implore all of the above-named Party figures. Please develop a third group whose mandate is to prepare, to brief and to groom all Party spokespersons who will appear on "talking head" shows, who will give press conferences, who will provide spin, who will in any way represent the message, the vision and the spirit of the Democratic Party, especially on the electronic media, so that they don't look unprofessional, so that they make compelling and lucid arguments, and so that they don't look weak and clueless against articulate, highly prepared and aggressive Republicans.


5. And most important of all. Please find a way to develop, disseminate, and enforce message discipline. Unless and until Democratic spokespersons are on the same page with the Party's message (and there should be one), the Republicans will continue to play them off one against the other.


And who am I to be making these demands of the High and the Mighty? In a word, I am nobody. I am simply a voice in the crowd, a random citizen saying what I feel needs to be said. I am one of the horde of small contributors who together hope we can make a difference.


I am also serious when I say that I have no intention of sending good money after bad. If the leadership of the Democratic Party elects not to make a convincing stand against Republican hegemony this election cycle, then there's nothing that my paltry few dollars can do to stem the tide. If the corporate heroin is so irresistible, if the elites' siren song is so compelling, then my lonely voice in the crowd must remain in obscurity. I can only say, I tried.


Finally, and sadly, I'm hearing other like voices in this bluest part of the bluest of states. And that news should serve as a wake-up call to Party leaders.


Patience is not unlimited. And time is running out.

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